As a newlywed you get asked the question “So, when are you having kids?” Like constantly. Check out the most annoying newlywed questions >>here<<. So to be perfectly honest right now kids are just not on my “to-do” list if you will, and it’s not because I’m “selfish” as so many people automatically assume that we are when we answer the question, it’s because children terrify the living shit out of me.
That might seem silly and weird to a lot of people, but it’s completely true. I’m a perfectionist, I like order, I like clean, I like my schedule and my hobbies, I love taking a weekend away…all things that make me sound selfish. But to me the idea of children leads to the constant unknown, messes EVERYWHERE and ALL THE TIME, nothing is ever in order, a schedule can be made but often broken, hobbies are set aside until they lose fruition, and no weekend is ever really a break anymore.
Granted, I do not have children so for those of you who do and still accomplish a steady life with order and still manage weekends away, well you are very few and far between and you are someone that everyone else admires. But not only do children terrify me in the aspect of just chaos in the household, it’s outside of the house that is out of my control that would tear me a part as a parent.
As a child I was tormented constantly, I went through a “chubby” stage if you will, as do a lot of other kids, but I was also the new girl in a new school from Minnesota all the way down to Florida. I was the girl who wore socks with my sandals because in Minnesota it’s always too cold not to wear socks. I was the girl who had outdated clothing from Old Navy and the “funny” northern accent. I was the pale girl with too dark and too short hair with a Columbia backpack normally used for hiking, while the other kids had decorative Jansport backpacks. I was the tomboy who took interests in PE over sitting playing hand games with the rest of the other girls.
Children terrify me because they are all cruel in their own ways, and while parents will never admit that their own child is a bully, it still happens to this day. It’s a never ending cycle of mean cat-calls and now with social media it’s just opening a million other doors to getting unwanted exposure and attention. Growing up being bullied is something I would never wish upon any child, my own or someone else’s.
Plus the idea of child birth completely destroys my confidence levels, I mean seriously I feel like that has to be the worst experience ever. I have a slight aversion to pain and I really don’t want to go through it, it just sounds all kinds of awful. So my answer to your annoying questions about children is just “no.” If they are in our future, then that’s just great, but as of right now we’re enjoying being married and enjoying the not-so-peace-and-quiet that is our life. Trust me when I say this, we’ve got enough going on right now without children.